Editor's note - Unless I'm confusing my various gods, the man in the white suit has a Buddha on his safe. Or a peacock. It's hard to tell.
Joke #2 - "I'm sorry. I lost the call. Either your son's division was annihilated, or it's just a Verizon outage. Cheer up. We'll find out in a few months either way, right?"
Joke #3 - "Yeah, she's shut down again. I think it's her power supply. What? Cycle power? Hang on. Where's the power button on this model? The right elbow? Okay, one sec."
Joke #4 - "Aw jeez. We were too late. They're out of iPhone 4s's. Will a Nokia do? Hey, come on, those support Flash..."
Joke #5 - "I'm sorry, Mrs. Pearson. He says the photos are already posted to the internet. There's no telling how many times they've been downloaded already. Well, that's what comes of intemperance, am I right? Silver lining time: He did ask if you've been working out more."
|Click for hugeness.|
Joke #2 - "Aw gee, Suzy, ya don't have to blubber about it. If you won't marry me, then maybe I'll just marry George or somebody. I just gotta get my green card is all."
Joke #3 - "I'm sorry, Fergus. While you were away at camp, I.. I... borrowed your baseball glove, just for a second. I put it right back, but I just got.... I got 'girl' all over it. I'm ever so sorry!"
Joke #4 - "Fergus McGee, you forgot our anniversary, you rat! That's the fifth time this summer! This relationship is smothering me! You go tell the ice cream man to divorce us. I'm going home. Get me a grape popsicle."
Joke #5 - "Oh, I don't know, Fergus. It just feels like we're living in some ridiculous Normal Rockwell imitation world. Everyone has that stupid rigid posture and they make those inane faces. Everything is so exagger -oh, for Christ sake, you're doing it RIGHT NOW!"
Joke #6 comes from Comatoast. Thanks Coma! - "I'm sorry the other ladies threw you out of the book club. I for one would have loved to read The Very Hungry Caterpillar. Look why don't we crank call the Eldridges down the street? That always makes you feel better right? You want to ask them if the fridge is running or should I?"
Joke #7 springs from the mind of Anonymous. Thanks you, secret joke maker! - Listen Dan, I told you if you come to work dressed like that again, I'm gonna have to call security. That's NOT what they meant by "Casual Friday!"
[Commenter jokes will be added to the post. -Mgmt.]