Imagine yourself or a loved (for now) one preserved in a genuine oil painting. Painted by you! Also, as an older version of his- or herself... maybe addicted to Methamphetamine! Also zombie! With no experience needed!
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Send only $9.95 and any size sharp, clear snapshot or color slide to receive a "Portrait" "Kit" which will show you how to add years to the age of the subject, hollow out the eye sockets, withdraw the flesh of the face, and give your child or foster-creature that "strung-out streetwalker with nowhere else to turn" look. Includes alternate painting instructions for "unsettling ghoul" and Steve Buscemi" versions. Or, simply leave unpainted for "leprous apparition" version. Thousands of bemused customers.