"Orange Juice - Ade, delivered refrigerated by dairies". Don't ask your dairy farmer what animal they squeeze this stuff out of. Just keep dreaming of herds of happy little oranges bouncing across the green hills of your Favorite Local Dairy.
Here's how to make orangeade out of those otherwise usesless and totally stupid oranges you have lying around:
- Three oranges, juiced.
- 1/2 lemon, juiced.
- Twist an orange peel over the juice. Or don't and just say you did because this can't possibly make a difference.
- 1/2 cup sugar
- Add water till you have a quart.
Finally! Oranges, but in liquid form! The future is now!.... in 1948!
How about that boy, huh? No human ever smiles with a gaping mouth like that unless you're a cartoon or a muppet. The boy was probably talking while they snapped the shot. Maybe he was antsy and they were having trouble getting him to take direction and everyone just wanted to go home? For whatever reason, we should all be grateful for his improbable puppet-smile, because it's funny.
Hmmm. He is pretty funny, but you know, he could be funnier. Phil Are GO! Graphic Blandishment and Photoshoppery Brigade: ASSEMBLE! Pkshhoowww!!!
Team, as I've said many times before, the best 'Shopping is the 'Shop where you can't be sure anything's been done at all. We need to be subtle on this one. What we need is one wandering eyeball and one droopy eyelid.
First, make a selection of his eyeball and shove it to the left a little. Then, utilize the pattern brush to repeat the sclera (white part) of his eye to cover the edge of the old eyeball.
"But where will we get a droopy eyelid?" you say? Try the lower lid on his other eye. Cut out a crescent of bottom eyelid, drag it over to the other eye and then flip it over.
The shading and color are darker over on the darker side of his face, and it should be about right for the darker tones we expect on an upper eyelid, because it won't be receiving as much light as the bottom eyelid. Light almost always comes from above, remember, and his eye socket should throw a little shadow on the upper eyelid.
Then, take his eyelashes from his normal upper eyelid and lift them onto a new layer and put them onto the edge of his new droopy eyelid, STAT!
Last, we need a little drop shadow under his new droopy eyelid. We've moved his eyelid down, and we need some shade underneath so the sclera looks like it's recieving some shadow from the eyelid in it's new position.
Boom! Complete! Now this boy is funnier. he could be drinking gasoline with a face like that. Let's distribute him to The Masses as a PNG. Good work, The Team!
Here's the newly "special" orangeade boy, ready to be pasted into your next happy hour invitation. Put whatever text you want in the green spot, because it doesn't say "Green Spot" any more. Get your rude finger ready to right click our little Foster Brooks onto your hard drive in three, two, one, RIGHTCLICK NOW! You're welcome!