2/23/11

Disappointment Plate - Treasure the moment.

Today, the Phil Are Go! Decorative Bric-A-Brac and Miscellaneous Festoonery team bring you a very special offer, direct from some yard sale or something. This offer comes from our best-selling "Anguish of Children" collection.
"Disappointment" tells a story - one we're all familiar with - lovingly rendered in crayon by Frances Hook, legendary American artist in the medium of waifish despair. A boy has walked out the door to go to work, only to realize he has locked his keys in the house. All he can do is stare forlornly through the window at his keys on the credenza, next to the TV Guide. They are only a few feet away, yet a world apart.
What happens next in the plate's narrative we can only guess... but he probably grabs a concrete frog from the garden and throws it through the window to get back in. What would you do? What would your child do? Well, you probably wouldn't look as adorably miserable as this absent-minded little man.


This plate is number 1836B in a limited run of however many we can sell in 1986. It has been masterfully reproduced on the finest Knowles China, which is a brand somebody has probably heard of. "Disappointment" would make a charming addition to your family room gallery of childhood sadness, next to your plate depicting clowns performing corrective spinal surgery on orphans, or possibly in the garage on the workbench, holding a treasured fistful of washers and half a roll of electrical tape.

To take advantage of this rare offer, please draw yourself an order form on white paper, cut it out, and lovingly send a check or money order for 6¢, plus $15 for shipping, handling and satire, to this address:

"Disappointment" Plate offer.
#12 Go! Tower
Go! Plaza
Chicago, IL
6060606060000

UPDATE: I just found out that Frances Hook also painted this kind-of famous picture of jesus that my mom has in her house. Another plate has just been added to the available collection: "Restraining Order Jesus".








5 comments:

Craig said...

I swear to Jeebus, I thought you were joking about the title and the artist.

I assumed that thing was made in some arts and crafts class.

That thing's a goddamned train wreck. I bet my aunt had the whole collection right next to the Emmett Kelly clowns.

Phil Are Go! said...

Hah! I know! That's why I had to include the shot of the back: to prove I didn't make it up.

Speaking of Emmet Kelly, I have a wonderful picture to post. Gotta remember to bring in my Emmet Kelly picture tomorrow. You're gonna like this.

Craig said...

One Christmas, my aunt got me this Titanic porcelain music box.

http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/41-SU6S4hlL._SL500_AA300_.jpg

Yeah.

She was the sweetest lady, but she went hoopy at the end of her life. I'm not sure if she miswrapped something, mis-ordered it from the Franklin Mint or just thought I was gay.

Jeremy Hornik said...

Your photograph of this plate, and the staging surrounding it, truly do it justice. All the Francis Hookers will be so pleased.

Dave Pryor said...

It's not every day you get to eat off of a plate of a kid in jail.

Post a Comment