Shelf Enthusiast - May, 1962.

DIY Decor 1973 - The fab floor.

Is your house an ugly dump? Sure! It's 1973! Who's isn't? Let's get busy de-uglifying and totally fabulizing your pad, man! Do you hip to what the jive is? Of course you all of those things! We had so many great ideas, we had to number them just to keep them in no particular order! Shew! Let's get to hammering!

What are using for a hamper right now? The floor, of course! Here's a way to actually have a hamper without feeling like you're submitting to The Man. Make yourself a groovy jeans pocket hamper and hang it on the door! It holds literally several things before it basically becomes a denim sphere, and that's when you know it's time to do some laundry... if that's your thing! What it is, my man!

Are you tired of being jealous of the Molen Rnomjs that live across the street? Sure! We all do! Those smug Dutch sophisticates! Well, here's their secret: that's just an ordinary front door with monograms and stuff cut out of plywood and glued on! This project is so simple you don't have to wait to come down before starting! And best of all, it's guaranteed not to bring down the property value of all the other houses on the street - ever!

This wallpaper backsplash will last for years and years. The heat and moisture of the stove top will just bounce right off of it and never, ever soften the wallpaper paste holding it up there. Good thing, too, because you'll never want to take it down! Neither will whoever buys your house after you die! This is one groovy idea that will be evergroovy.

Time is money, right? Sure! We all do! Show the world how money your time is by spending several hours of your time dolling up this five dollar lawn chair. Sew this lawn chair cover with directional arrows to help you make a perfect two-cheek landing, even after a few glasses of "zero"... whatever that is! Right on!

Do you have some creepy sort-of-French stuffed dolls that need punishing? Well, give them something to think about with this home made doll stockade. Just cut some perfectly good red acrylic and hinge it with 1" piano hinges on the back. After a few days stuck in this thing, those dolls will think twice, you bet! What did they do to deserve this? Just look at them. They know what they did! Thanks for ratting them out, lion... or maybe bear?

Does your couch just sit there, and never float out from underneath you when you're about to sit down? Enough of that! Hang your couch from the ceiling and start swinging! Live in an apartment? Well, don't let Old Man The Landlord tell you what you can't do to his or her building that isn't your property! You may need to go into the apartment upstairs to add some fender washers to the ends of the lag bolts that poke up through the floor, but you just know they'll understand the importance of swinging. By the way, a couch this wiggly may not be the best for saving sex on, but that's what the front yard is for! Sock it to me!

Bathroom laminate.

Household tips... from science!

If you're tired of the hassle associated with covering your sandbox and storing a sheet of plywood all winter long, why not simply disassemble your sandbox and store the sand in rows and rows of identical milk cartons?

Over the long winter, you can count your milk cartons and make sure the labels all face the same way. In addition, you can have fun making sure that each carton holds the exact same number of sand pieces. Don't forget to store and perfectly arrange every nail and board from the sandbox, too.

But EXTRA don't forget that those sand cartons make a handy hiding place for perfectly ordinary body parts, for those awkward occasions when the police get all jumpy over nothing.

This super neat fishbowl cover can be made from a hair net and some embroidery hoops. It prevents your fish from jumping out and dialing for help. Also, it prevents your cat from "fishing", provided your cat is not especially strong, not especially bored, not especially persistent, and doesn't have teeth or claws. Best of all, the net makes a handy strainer, making it quick and easy to feed your fish! Your time is valuable! Chicken bones, cigarette butts and doorknobs are easily strained out as you pour fish food into the bowl.

Tips for doing things to your house, family.

When using vise, take care to keep "at-risk" eyebrows from getting tangled in the jaws.

Unpleasant windows may be covered with temporary panel. Also, a confederate flag may be used. Also, just pile some spare bodies in front of unsightly "wall hole".

Easily made wire guide allows shaving of  incision area for quick "rainy day brain surgery". In next month's issue - "How to Suture Like a Fancy Doctor".

Plywood inexpensively permanently approximately simulates hardwood paneling, a warm, inviting look your family will enjoy for minutes to come. To remove, simply move to new house, mutually agreeing never to discuss paneling again.