5/16/16

Day's Sportswear - Why so serious, Kerchief Man?

Aah, 1969. It was a simpler time when a man could wear a brightly colored kerchief around his neck and, at the same time, could squint into the middle distance in a hairily manly way and no one would wonder whether he was Living His Truth, or Being So Brave.

According to Day's Sportswear, you could "change your image in only 5 days." How? By wearing clothes of mostly the same color that, for all the world, look like Garanimals.

"Wait. What are Garanimals?" you say? Garanimals were are clothes that kids could pick out and match up themselves, based on what cartoon character is on the tag. This also works splendidly for clueless adults... who happen to be thirty inches tall. So, there's a problem right there, unless your Tyrion Lannister.


Enter Day's Sportswear! By buying five outfits that are all blue and yellow, you could "change your image". Well, they definitely weren't lying. Nuff said.

Since this ad ran in Esquire magazine (the journal of the financially carefree, romantically whimsical and probably virulent), Day's Sportswear knew how to sell the lifestyle of the furry gent who wore only two colors. Check it out. The legend indicates where you need to wear each plaid. Kerchief Man is dressed for "lazy days", but not so lazy that he would forget to accessorize his look with a coordinated neck napkin. You never know when someone will lazily offer you some saucy ribs, and you wouldn't want to get red on your nice yellow pants. He looks super serious, doesn't he? "Don't make fun of my special napkin." he warns us.

Anyway, despite looking like he means business, the rest of the week for the blue and yellow man consists of "villa", "casino" (which we can assume requires a leisure suit with the blue and yellow plaid of square #3), "harbor lights", and "oasis". Oasis? Maybe Kerchief Man likes to hang out in highway rest stops? - which is fine, so long as he doesn't take his wide stance all the way to his office as a Senator of Idaho. It could be bad for the career.

So, a full week for Kerchief Man consists of lazy, villa, casino, harbor lights, and oasis. Shew! Busy busy! By the time Saturday rolls around, Mister Kerchief needs some rest form all that doing-not-much-of-anything. Hey, maybe he's a senator after all?

This leisurely fella still has lots of work to do! Your hard drive has a Senator Kerchief-shaped hole that we're about to fill. Let Mister K add some seriousness to nearly any graphic. Wedding invitations. Yacht-themed divorce parties. Some kind of mitsvah.

Here he is as a PNG with a transparent alpha channel. Also, you know what? You deserve a 1000 x 1000 avatar of him, too, cropped all special to fit in his unforgettable kerchief. Everyone on whatever social media thing you use is going to know you're a person of super serioius leisure, for sure. So much the graphic gifts! How do we do it? I dunno, but you're welcome!

Click for full size.

Click for full size.

Click for full size.


1 comments:

PhilAreGo@gmail.com said...

Well spotted. Kerchief Man is ready to find some spooks in style! thanks, Mat!

[-Mgmt.]

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