Iiiiiii'm the man in the box.

Joke #1 - International Correspondence Schools' least-responded ad: "Singing in Various Shapes, Lesson One - Cubes."

Joke #2 - A much earlier, and much less famous "Steely Dan" recording session.

Joke #3 - For the "differently talented" vocalist: the soundproof recording booth... also recording proof, and dignity proof.

Joke #4 - The ugly underbelly of the recording industry, where all too many eager young talents get their first paying "gig".

Joke #5 - From the banned first season of Hollywood Squares: Paul Lynd and his "musical personal massager"... an answer to a question no one asked.

Joke #6 - Behind the scenes in Consumer Reports' suit-testing chamber, measuring for a critical feature in Fifties America: squareness absorption.

Joke #7 - Jim J. Bullock's much-ignored album "Listening to my Pants".

Joke #8 - An early failure to create a tesseract in controlled conditions: the "square within a square", whose points can be described by the formula {(x,y,z,h): 0  x  1, 0  y  1, 0  z  1, 0  h  DORK}.

[Commenter jokes will be added to the post. -Mgmt.]


Fil said...

Gahaha thanks for the close-up of the dildo, Phil.

PhilAreGo@gmail.com said...

No problem. Nothing's too good for our readers.


Jim Dillon said...

#5 made coffee come out my nose. And I quit drinking coffee 3 weeks ago! If you'll emcee my son's bar mitzvah, I'll quickly convert to Judaism to make it possible.

PhilAreGo@gmail.com said...

Mr. Dillon: We are sorry to hear about your nose, coffee, and all points below.

While we cannot ensure availability for any particular date or venue, we can promise an "Inappropriate Joke Sweep" of all banquet halls in a given metropolitan area for a period of two days, if we are given adequate notice. This is a service we provide for a nominal fee to be determined by the cost of the tux rental, plus the number of security personnel required to remove us from the premises, times the number of bartenders are the event in question. If you require ritual genital mutilation for your son, you'll still need a rabbi for that.

We look forward to doing business with you.


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