Kooking Kornir - Stratified Fruit Putty Caldera

Are you looking for a dessert that will stand the test of time AND remedy a ho-hum dinner conundrum? Well, call off the hounds! After your dinner eruption, surprise your family with this swollen dome of fantastic fruit flavor: Stratified Fruit Putty Caldera!

 Begin with a nice solid cake dish, laying down a mantle of blackberry consomme' and fish gravy. Thicken with thickener. Let this cool and consolidate. If it begins to lithify, you can halt the process by adding some thinener (You DO want to be able to puch a fork through it!). This completes your dessert's primary Cambrian fruit putty layer.

Next, mix up a package of pistachio frosting, adding in 1/2 cup of minced pickles. You can also substitute olives. Whip the mixture in a blender to give it body, through formation of vacuoles. The durometer of this strata is important, as it forms the boundary layer between the Cambrian cranberry layer and the strawberry lithosphere above. If it is too soft, you will see intermingling of the strawberry lithosphere and Cambrian layer. Spoon this onto the Cambrian layer.

Lastly, mix one package strawberry gelatin, 1/4 cup strawberry Quick, and 1/4 cup pink Crunchberries in a blender set to "blend". Sprinkle in raisins and set blender to "mix" for five seconds, to suspend the raisin fossils in the strawberry lithosphere. What ancient secrets will your family learn from these mysterious inclusions? The secrets of sweetness! Carefully dollop this onto the pistachio boundary layer.

Now, chill overnight and serve. You'll simply love watching your family drill into chambers of flavor! Ole!


Jim Dillon said...

Swollen dome . . . I love it.

PhilAreGo@gmail.com said...

Oh man. Only now did I realize I could have used "turgid" instead. Too pretentious maybe?

Thanks, Jim!


MrsBug said...

I'm sorry, but the only word that comes to mind after seeing this is "pustule".

PhilAreGo@gmail.com said...

Mrs. B, you say "pustule" like it's a BAD thing! We must celebrate every facet of life. Embrace the pustule! Give it a big hug!

Thanks for reading, Mrs. B.


Fil said...

'Hugging Pustules' is the name of my new band.

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