'66 Dodge Monaco - No unboxing video.

I likes me some station wagon. They've been replaced by something stupid and childish - the SUV. Why has it become unfashionable to drive a useful car that is only as large as you need it to be? How is it better to drive a massive off road vehicle that will only ever drive back and forth to the mall? Aah yes, because fashion has everything to do with self image and nothing to do with reality. People want to feel tough and free, so they buy a car that canyon dwellers use, instead of buying what makes sens for where you live. Don't get me started.

Dodge wants us to think of the 1966 Dodge Monaco wagon as "not boxy-looking". Well, it's not boxy compared to an actual box, I guess.
As is usual for car manufacturers, Chrysler named the Monaco after a city famous for a race that takes place there, which has exactly nothing in common with the car bearing the name. This station wagon is about as racy as a cardboard box with a spoiler. Maybe the Chrysler wizards would argue that Monaco is also a famous vacation spot, full of glamour and whatever. We know perfectly well that they'd like you to think of racing cars when you think of Monaco. Nice try, guys. A station wagon by any other name would still be designed to haul groceries.

Do not misunderstand. I like wagons for their honesty. I also dislike advertising for it's profound dishonesty. The Dodge Monaco is not a race car - even less so in wagon form.

Anyway, this wagon sure is long. You could keep a smaller car inside it, to help you get around. Gotta get something from the cargo area? Jump in the car and drive out to the tailgate. If you're not back by nightfall, send out the bloodhounds. The long lines of the Monaco look good enough, but I think it would also look good if it was a bit shorter...
Much better! This way, when you fill the back with groceries and flat pack furniture, you can wheelie all the way home. Call that boring if you want, because I sure don't.

Click for big

Click for big, but shorter.


BrainThought said...

In all honesty, that shortened Monaco; if you were to move that rear axle back about 2/3rds the way to the bumper that's be a pretty awesome shooting-brake layout. Fit right in with some of it's European contemporaries too, the Jaguar E-Type Coupe and the Jensen Interceptor...

Ermott said...

This is easier to do than you'd think. First, get a pair of doors from a Monaco two door car. Then, move back the door post, modify the rear doors (cut back) so that they become part of the body, no longer function. We did this with a 1966 bel aire wagon, turned it into a "cool" sedan delivery (because we couldn't afford custom glass for what was left of the rear doors.

Mattress in the back... and off to the drive-in.

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