Gulf Oil - Mister smooth.

How about a baffling oil ad to start your weekend off right? "Please don't!" you say? Right you are. Coming right up! Get those eye-holes ready to receive some first-class awkward, post haste!

Visit your too-friendly neighborhood Gulf station for some special attention from the attendant on duty, who apparently has some kind of hernia problem or abdominal injury and like to ride horses. Or something.

Yes, it was a simpler time back then in yesteryear. A woman who (naturally) doesn't understand anything about car thingies could rely on her local Gulf station to take care of her needs. Note to self: have an intern insert a randomly chosen "lube" joke here. Also have the intern insert some kind of "insert" joke here too.

Anyway, please join me in going double you tee eff is with the guy wearing the lifting belt and/or truss putting the moves on a bafflingly receptive customer... with the obvious approval of the station manager? Does the ruptured man with the muck boots work at the station? Is he just a customer? Was he just cleaning out the septic tank and decided it was time for a quick break and some hitting-on? Most importantly, why is Betty Sue INTO HIM? Does this make people buy motor oil?

Come on, The Past! I'm trying to understand you! You're supposed to be all quaint and goofy. You're not supposed to make me want to take a silkwood shower just from looking at a stupid ad. I think we should spend some time apart. I'll be over at The Future's house. It's always just as cool and shiny as I want it to be. It understands me. You're just creepy.

Click for big.

P.S.   Hey. Check it out. This is our 666th post here at Phil Are GO! Creepy groovy. Time for an Iron Sabbath lunch listen. Please make The Corna at will. Rock on. Post on. Run to the hills.