Unofficial non-post placeholder - Failed teas.

Well, the staff at GO! Tower has the day off to re-balance their wheels to compensate for all the ice frozen into the rims while their cars were parked (Top tip: hockey pucks and Gorilla Glue!). So, here's a post-that's-not-a-post.

When shopping for food-stuffs, avoid purchasing these industry-wide worst-selling packaged teas:
  • Pasture Farms' Honey Lemon Flopsweat
  • Ponceberry Wingwang
  • Dr. Placebo Q. Doonothing's Acai Rejuvenator
  • Herbal Twig Splash
  • Nature Farms' Midnight Movement Excellent Digestive
  • Qang's Super Number One Lucky Best Luck Tea
  • Barely-There Premium Wind Tea
  • Mrs. Wheatbale's Meadow Sweeper Tea
  • Fern Gloop Zinger... With more pistals.
  • Nature's Fallacy Extra-Bogus Preparation
  • Wet Monk
  • Official People's Republic of Probably Tea
  • Phish's Phavorite Mushroom Whoop-De-Doo
  • Placid Rectum Super Cleanse


Jim D. said...

Also avoid anything offered by Vermont Pleasures. http://www.vice.com/read/vermont-pleasures-0000214-v21n1

PhilAreGo@gmail.com said...

AAAAH! Jesus! You shold have warned me the link was NSFW! I would never buy tea from any place that sells dildos on the same page. Nuff said!

Thanks for the non-unseeable offerings, Jim!


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