American School of Aviation - Are you a He-Man?

Are you a red-blooded, daring he-man? If you are, then by the power of Grayskull, have we got an opportunity for you... back in 1927. Be an aviation!

Back in '27, airplanes were new and exciting. The age when commercial aviation became a humiliating ordeal in which you are not allowed to have baggage, but instead are eyeballs-deep in the "emotional support dogs" of your neurotic fellow passengers was still many decades away. No, friends. Back then, blood was red, and men were he, and also daring. Except..... hey, wait a second!

None of the actually advertised jobs are anything like being a pilot. Maybe being an instructor requires you to know how to fly the plane, but that could just as easily be an instructor who teaches people to be... "mechanicians"? This whole thing stinks of bait and switchiness. Look at the photos. Crowds crowding around the plane, each fighting for their chance to get naked with the red-blooded he-man at the controls. The promise of your own leather Time Bandits hat. These are all things that the frikkin pilot gets to enjoy.

David Warner as the evil pilot in Time Bandits, and as the deceitful douchebag who created this ad.

And why is the salesman's salary listed as "$5000 a year" when all the others are described in terms of "per week"? Divide 5000 by 52 and you get about $96 bucks a week... a salary that falls near the middle of the pack for the other aviation gigs.

They wanted the biggest number next to the sales job because they wanted it to jump out at you - assuming you're in a hurry, don't read the fine print, or are just dumb. This must be because the American School of Aviation wanted salesmen the most. I promise you, the adoring crowds in that photo are not shouting "Who sold you the plane? We MUST know, so we can have hot monkey sex with him and/or her!"

So, tricking people with advertising is as old as advertising. Shocking. Anyway, here's the Disembodied Floating Head from today's ad. Maybe you can use him to Tom Sawyer people into doing your boring work, thinking it's a total party, while you pop off and fly around.


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