Danger bomb.

Joke #1 - "My god gentlemen. The box isn't joking. This bomb is almost completely made out of danger. It really is a danger bomb!"

Joke #2 - "Wait. God dammit. This alleged 'danger bomb' is merely a 'discomfort bomb'. These terrorists really are just fucking with us now. ...But still, it looks really itchy in there."

Joke #3 - After making contact with the device from a safe distance of fourteen inches, Special Commander Basil Stoneguard could then begin to defuse the arming mechanism, protected by his Anti-Danger Vest and Extreme Safety Trilby.

Joke #4 - If he made a mistake and set off the device, the Peril Funnel should direct most of the blast directly through his face, protecting his shirt and hat from danger.

Joke #5 - "Yes, I think I see the device. It looks like it's, oooh, about nine hundred yards away. I'll need the extra long pliers, I think."

Joke #6 - The Sigma f/2.0 macro bomb lens allows for sharp, bright  close-ups of almost any explosive device. And, as a true macro lens, you can be sure that any explosions that blow you up will be at perfect one-to-one scale, without any unwanted optical magnification.

[Commenter jokes will be added to the post.   -Mgmt.]

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