Squire Slacks - Ignoring is bliss.

Aaah, 1969. A magical year between the Swinging Sixties and the Mouth-Breathing High School Dropout Seventies. In this ad, we find a Freddie Mercury-Christopher Reeves lovechild trying to decide which of his artfully draped child brides he wants to ignore the most. What a time it must have been to be alive... and a conscious participant in society.

The ladies in this photo don't seem to mind sharing their groovy dude. One wife gets his shoulder, one gets his knee, and one wife is sort of cupping his butt cheek, but seems to be looking up at his elbow, wondering if she can possibly trade up. She's got ambition. I like her spirit.

You'd think Floor Wife would mind being stepped on by Shoulder Wife, but she doesn't seem to mind or even notice. She's only got eyes for the camera. Oooo. Who's Camera Wife? We'll have to wait till the April '69 issue of Esquire to possibly find out.

If you talk to other humans for work (probably) or pleasure (may god forgive you), you probably do it with a computer. If you talk to other humans on a computer, your chitchat service may let you choose a little self-portrait, so your chitchat combatants can see the face whom god may need to forgive. If you can choose a little self-portrait, you may want to add the faces from today's ad to your growing collection of avatars on your storage doohickey of choice. They're all RGB 1000 px square JPEGS, so there's probably not a system on the planet that could object to them... on technical grounds, at least. You're welcome!

Click each to big each.

Freddy Mercury-Reeves, wondering where his mustache might have fallen off.

Shoulder Wife, just happy with the scapula.

Floor Wife, looking like she's wondering about being Camera Wife.