Learn karate at home faster this easy picture way!

You at reading! Yes you! Stop read and get karate at home and learn this easy picture way! Not words way! Self should be defend against all! Words bad! Go karate on words, POW!

Are you tired of being bullied by giants, with their baffling quotation marks and words they say that aren't easy like pictures are? Learn karate! Not with words! Picture way!

Fear no man or giant! Brutes and muggers are also not a problem. However, no mention of knolls, goblins, orcs, or bugbears, though. It's possible they all have some sort of anti-karate AOE spell that nullifies your picture-way karate. Beware all non-brutes, non-giants, non-muggers, and non-mans.
No "mumbo jumbo". It's possible that mumbo jumbo would be effective against orcs, goblins, etc., but cannot be taught in easy picture way. For proper mumbo jumbo training, see Deepak Chopra, Dr. Oz, or Gwyneth Paltrow.
Karate expert splits 1" x 2" board with one swift blow of hand. Once again, the karate ad is foiled by its greatest enemy, the quotation mark. A one-inch by two-inch board would indeed be hard to split with your hand, but simpler still to just throw it away. If that's a one by two inch board in the picture, it's good to know our President once found work as a hand model. Zing!

This practice dummy is "suitable for mounting". Assuming that the mounting in question is of the "stick it on a wall" type and not the "humping like a baboon" kind, the same could be said of the beer-soaked cocktail napkin that is stuck to the ceiling of my basement rumpus room. It better be suitable for mounting, cause it's definitely mounted to the ceiling.

It seems that the wiener punch is an attack - wups, sorry! - "attack" that you can only learn from intense picture training, with the benefit of a paper poster practice dummy.  Don't all toddlers learn this special move by dint of simple trial and error? Could it be that all children have special karate picture-way training? Are we to assume that all kids also are expert in the nostril punch and the formidable thumb attack?

Best to just avoid kids, people.


Jim D. said...


Steve Miller said...

"Learn Karate at Home and Earn This Autopsy Diagram"

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