Baby Cot - Prepped for launch!

The year is 1960. The cold war is about as frosty as ever, and America goes about it's business, but just under the surface, everyone is holding their breath. When will the reds attack? Will we be ready? Will YOUR family be ready?
In the interest of national defense, our trusty British allies designed for us this tactical baby launcher. (Click on picture for larger, more readable version.) It could be cleverly deployed in the yard (or "garden" as the Brits call it) looking like any ordinary baby cot, looking for all the world like the cots the baby army slept on in their baby barracks.

But, should the Russians invade your nation, the baby cot could be quickly installed in a vehicle, making every family car a potential piece of baby-firing artillery. The proud parents would simply speed towards the target and slam on the brakes. The baby would then be launched through the windshield. Assming the baby had been primed with an explosive or incindiary charge, the enemy would in all likelihood snuff it... or be completely freaked out.

Unless, of course, the communists just chose to launch a missile at us. That would have made the tactical baby obsolete overnight. And sudden missile attack was what the whole cold war was really about the whole time anyway. Hmm. This whole "cold war" thing is more complicated than it seems.

Could it be that this baby launcher was invented just to be a baby cot? In that case WTF were you thinking, nineteen sixty? Look at it. It's positioned right between the front seat passengers so the baby wouldn't hit their heads on the way out. It couldn't be MORE of a baby launcher. Sometimes I can't believe our race has survived this long.


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