Resintone - Covers anything at all.

Joke #1: New Resintone paint is available in a rainbow of colors. Olive Dyspepsia and Institutional Green.

 Joke #2: Use Resintone to cover almost any surface. However, we recommend grandfather clocks and other surface irregularities be sanded to the level of the wall before painting.

Joke #3: Be sure to carefully prepare the surface to be painted. First wipe with a mild soap and water solution and allow to dry. Then, prime with flowered wallpaper...
Joke #4: Resintone covers any surface, any color, in one coat! For windows larger that 120 square inches, we recommend using Resintone Window Plugs before painting over.

Joke #5: Spills on hard surfaces can be cleaned up quickly with warm water. For carpet spills, use Resintone Carpet-Match touch up paint.

 Joke #6: A single coat hides almost any surface! You can cover plaster, brick, wood, cement, wallboard, flat oil-paint... even wallpaper! To cover deep-seated resentment or other "problem emotions", two coats may be necessary. Test Resintone on a hidden emotion before use, to determine suitability.

Joke #7: Resintone paint is available in several colors to suit any decor. For best results, immediately paint again with something less hideous, possibly from Sears.


Sue said...

I would have appreciated an "almost did a 'spit take' with hot tea" box to check.

Phil Are Go! said...

Thanks for reading, Sue! It sounds like you have an iPad, with MultiSpit touchscreen interface. You can spit up to three different liquids on the screen simultaneously, for absolute gesture recognition. I'm super jealous.

Sue said...

Sorry, no iPad. Just a laptop I can ruin with one liquid. So, no need to be super jealous, just jealous.

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