Science Update - Trains and Asbestos Breakthroughs / Breaksthrough.

New advancements in the science of model train enjoyment have left children incontinent with glee. Various animated trackside accessories bring added realism to model train layouts. See below.
The children at left can be seen enjoying the enhancements to their model train. Boy stares at wonderful new freight yard while girl fantasizes about exciting new outfits the train may wear. Next Christmas, they hope to get a larger table so that the train can move.

The miniature conductor's shack next to this immobile train set is pants-wettingly exciting to this sad, sheltered boy. The train's control unit doubles as a defibrillator.

This new humidifier wick is made from asbestos, which will not rot, rust, or burn, aiding in humidifcation and cancerizing throughout the home.

A new synthetic asbestos substitute can be made from ceramic fiber, freeing up the world's precious asbestos supplies for more important uses, like, holding without safety equipment, snuggling, and rubbing on one's lungs.


Dan said...

"incontinent with glee" I'm stealing that phrase.

Phil Are Go! said...

Send your royalty checks to:
Phil Are Go!
Go! Tower
#12 Go! Plaza
Chicago, IL

Thanks for reading, Dan!

Craig said...

Synthetic Asbestos Substitute is constructed of aspartame, Red Dye #3, dioxin, DDT, ebola and Agent Orange.

Dave Pryor said...

I think this could also be tagged with asbestos. That comical mischief-causer is working his way into many topics on PAG these days.

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