3/9/11

G.E. Americana - Fashionable for several minutes.

Barb loved her new kitchen. The colors were so very "now". The cherry cabinets matched nearly approximately the hue of the countertops, and her new G.E. Americana appliances, in trendy Goldenrod enamel, were the star of the show.
Her husband had pushed hard for the Arranged Bacon Patriot curtains, which Barb wasn't all that fond of, but he'd let her get the tile in Chewed Muselix Beige, so it was a fair trade.

Doug had made her the bookshelves, so she could keep all her recipes close to hand - everything from roast beef to braised beef, right where she needed it. Doug could build anything, so long as it could be made from 1x12 and involved no "tricky cutting".

She had continued her patriotic brown theme with that little revolutionary snare drum and the Crucified Liberty cabinet handles.

Yes, Barb was sure her kitchen would be the toast of Wood Vole Ave, and she would have a dinner party to celebrate. She knew just who to invite. She'd call Carol Brady, and Lieutenant Fish and that delightful Gabe Kotter.

2 comments:

PhilAreGo@gmail.com said...

Note: The management wishes to point out that it understands that all the television characters listed are from 1970's-era shows. The management insists that kitchens this ugly persisted well through the seventies, and in particularly deprived regions, the 1990's. While open-minded jerks like the management are capable of enjoying such unfortunate kitchens on an ironic level, the management believes itself to be very much in the minority in this capacity.

Intra-Office Note: Will the staffer who left the Glad Take-Along (TM) with the bell peppers and beef residue in the sixth floor East sink please clean it out and take the Take-Along home? The odor, once evocative and appetizing, has now evolved into Smell Heifers and Feet, and may soon attract raccoons, or college students. Please do not post this note in the comment text, despite the fact that I included it in them both same memo to you. That kind of sloppiness is what got your predecessor sacked.

-Mgmt.

Unknown said...

First time I've ever heard of food referred to as "handsomely brown."

Flip Wilson, yes.

Turkey, no.

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