Ear bulbs.

Joke #1 - Google Glass. If your friends think it's weird. get cooler friends.

Joke #2 - "Yes, I think it's working. I think I can hear the dolphins. They're saying 'You look like...look like...' -It's hard to make out- 'look like... a video?... no, wait.... yes! An idiot!"

Joke #3 - Using these super-powerful binaural microphones and special wave stabilizing helmet, you can hear what people are saying about you from over fifty yards away. We're thinking of making the knob bigger.

Joke #4 - If left untreated, swimmer's ear can lead to a condition known as "Needing to Wear a Really Weird Helmet".

Joke #5 - "It's a little obtrusive. Maybe if we can get smaller wing nuts, I think we're on to a winner."

Joke #6 - Beats, by "Dr". Dre. Gigantic, heavy, with non-adjustable equalization you can't turn off, designed for only one kind of music, and commonly reviewed as being sonically inferior to other headphones costing half the price. Now available in purple rhinestones.

Joke #7 comes to us from Mr FancyAquariumPants_2. Thanks, fishpants! - Photo of Cpl. Lance Weiss volunteering for the Government funded "Swimming Between Two Dolphins If they Had Suction Cups" simulation, which took 2 decades & over $40 million U.S. taxpayer dollars to complete. The Government concluded that dolphins would "probably not ever have suction cups" and that Cpl. Weiss said the helmet "didn't fit well" and would continue the research "in the event the dolphins DID get suction cups". Cpl. Weiss could not be reached for comment.

Charlie says he loves his Good & Plenty - Google Ears 1.0. So true, Charlie. Then we can call the early adopters "earholes". Hah!

[Commenter jokes will be added to the post.    -Mgmt.]