Doctor lessons.

 Joke #1 - "So, as you may have surmised from the distinct odor, abdominal distention and overall pallor, the patient not only cannot be helped, but also represents a total waste of our time, is a stupid jerkwad, and probably won't live out the week. Please take note as I gently break the news in such a way as not to upset him."

Joke #2 - In landmark fourteen-hour procedure, with the combined skills of six surgeons, man undergoes world's first Total Excision of All Monies. Three months later, the treatment was deemed a success when he was re-examined and found to still be completely money-free.

Joke #3 - Patient requires six doctors to explain to him why he cannot afford the services of any of them.

Joke #4 - "This patient's volume desperately needs up-pumping. Doctor Christian Slater, I believe you have some expertise in this area?"

Joke #5 - "Hm. The patient seems to suffer from 'manic almond joyosis'. It is my professional opinion that, sometimes, this man feels like a nut.  By way of contrast, let us examine a Mounds, which don't."

[Commenter jokes will be added to the post.   -Mgmt.]