Behold, the distant future! The world of 1999!

Citizens, I'm sure you often wonder what The Future will be like. Well, you can thank the Philco corporations (no relation) for making, and FaceTuber "Stakker" for posting this 1969 film The Year 1999 A.D.! That's a lot of nines! Will there still be humans, or will the world simply be populated by a master race of nines? What wonders await? What horrors? Well, look for these horrorwonders in the fantastic year of 1999 A.D.!!!!!!!

-The pacing and tone of life in 1999 will be eerie and weird (probably stoned), but that may just be the 1969 film makers.

-Music will be chosen and played seemingly at random.

-As many things that can possibly be "disposable" will be "disposable". Presumably, the Earth will be orbited by at least fifty moons, all made of garbage.

-Many sentences will be cut off by a jumpcut, and you'll never know what the person was trying to s-

-All members of the family will use marvellous technology, but women will use it to perpetuate their subjugation to men, making (frozen) meals to order, and relying on their husbands to control all money and make all decisions.

-Every task performed by a computer will require a separate piece of hardware, with the home office filled with boxes and screens. Imagine all the machines we'll get to buy for all our technically-assisted tasks!

1999 is going to be a great future. I can't wait! Can you also not wait? You really should consider being unable to wait.

Just for good measure, here's Flight of the Conchords doing The Distant Future / Robots, about life in the year 2000. What a marvellous time it shall be!


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