12/25/19
Thunderbirds - Give or Take a Million S2E6
<<< CRITICAL THUNDERBIRDS CHRISTMAS DATA >>>
Hear ye, hear ye, and also FYI. There is a Pointy Tree Day-themed episode of Thunderbirds that makes for some decent weirdcreepy holiday viewing. If you're an Amazon Prime subscriber, just look for season 2 episode 6, called "Give or Take a Million".
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| Since Thunderbirds is basically a toy box sprung horrifically to life, it's already pretty Christmassy to start with. A Christmas episode of Thunderbirds, even more so. You're not chicken, are you? |
12/17/19
12/16/19
12/9/19
12/6/19
12/4/19
12/3/19
11/27/19
Lazy annual post of this type - Pointy Tree Day Gift Tags!
As we all prepare for Annual Gluttony Day, and as we gird our collective loins for Seasonal Retail Atrocity Day, I think it's only proper that we keep in mind the real reason for the holidays: buying stuff for people and hoping they don't judge us for getting something they hate and thinking we're a terrible friend / sibling / parent / romantic partner / spouse / stalker.
So, now comes the time when everyone here at GO! Tower wish you and your family the most financially brutal Seasonal Retail Atrocity Day possible. To make the ordeal slightly less horrible to trudge through, please take comfort in the fact that it's stupid to buy cutesy tags to stick on all your Pointy Tree Day gifts, when we have tags right here for you that are better in every way than the maudlin crap at the store... except that you have to cut them apart yourself after you print them. Oh yeah, and you have to print them. But they're free, at least. Jeez, whattaya want for nothin'? A rubber biscuit?
So, now comes the time when everyone here at GO! Tower wish you and your family the most financially brutal Seasonal Retail Atrocity Day possible. To make the ordeal slightly less horrible to trudge through, please take comfort in the fact that it's stupid to buy cutesy tags to stick on all your Pointy Tree Day gifts, when we have tags right here for you that are better in every way than the maudlin crap at the store... except that you have to cut them apart yourself after you print them. Oh yeah, and you have to print them. But they're free, at least. Jeez, whattaya want for nothin'? A rubber biscuit?
11/22/19
11/21/19
11/20/19
11/19/19
11/18/19
11/14/19
2019 Pointy Tree Day Card Get!!!!111oneoneone
Q: "How the hell can I get my Phil Are GO! Pointy Tree Day Card?
A: It couldn't be easier! Just send us your addre- Q: "TELL ME HOW!!! NOW NOW NOW!"
A: Hey, shut up and let me finish, spaz. Send us your address. That's it. PhilAreGo@gmail.com
Q: My actual mailing address? How do I know you're not going to stalk me?
A: You don't, but how do I know you're fascinating enough to stalk? Besides, we're all too busy here at Go Plaza to bother with stalking people. Look, if it's really that important to you, email us an outline explaining why your lifestyle is so interesting that we'd want to sit in the bushes and stare in your windows. If you're really that great, we'll try and get someone out to your house to glance in your direction, but no promises. We've got stuff to do, man. Jeez, narcissist much? If you think we have the time to sit in an unmarked van across the street from your house, you are probably grossly overestimating the interestingness of your life, and also the amount of free time we have here at GO! Tower. If you're that paranoid, give us your work address, or the address of someone you know. We don't care.
Q: Free? Yeah, right.
A: That's technically not a question. But yeah. Free. Crazy, huh?
Q: I'm a-scared. Can't you just email it to me?
A: That's lame. No.
Q: How many different Pointy Tree Day Card versions are there?
A: A bunch of different ones.
Q: Can I pick which of the ones I get?
A: Nope. A one will be chosen by our Officer of Randomness and sent to you.
Q: If I collect all the versions of the Phil Are GO! Pointy Tree Day Card from way long ago, will they be valuable some day?
A: Sure. Why not? Go nuts. All you have to do is live forever to prove it.
Q: Can I get one of each of the ones? I want them all!
A: Don't be greedy.
Q: Free? What's the catch?
A: Alaskan salmon in butter lemon sauce with summer squash and a side salad. Also, there isn't one.
Q: Are these just leftovers from last year's cards? Or the year before?
A: How dare you. And no, they're not. All of the ones feature an image we've posted over the past year.
Q: Why do I want one of your stupid holiday cards?
A: Good question. I dunno. Because they're free and possibly funny?
Q: Will this year's card contain any "post-consumer content"?
A: Eew. No. Sicko.
A: Hopefully. Especially if you make a little puppet out of it and make it tell jokes.*
*Jokes told with a Phil Are GO! Pointy tree Day Card Puppet are the responsibility of the Pointy Tree Day Card recipient and the Pointy Tree Day Card puppeteer. Phil Are GO! denies responsibility for any content recited by the Pointy Tree Day Card Puppet.
11/13/19
11/12/19
11/8/19
11/7/19
11/5/19
11/4/19
11/1/19
Up Your Decor - Holiday redecorating!
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| Your Silent Night will be full of the jealous screams of your guests when you re-vision your house in this super chic Exmess Noir theme! Start with thick, rich black pile carpet, and then compliment it with thick, rich black pile wallpaper! MmmmMMmmm! You and Santa want to just wallow around in your walls! Some kind of dead thing on the floor will warm up your feet those cold winter nights! And lastly, a star-shaped mirror makes your bed the perfect manger where the animals kept their watch or something! |
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| Who doesn't love Early American decor? Not nobody! That's who doesn't! This gorgeous holiday dinner experience starts with vinyl parkay flooring and a majestic colonial dining set that every last one of your relatives will be positively fighting to gather 'round! You know what the early Americans would have wanted? Wallpaper with a nice, gigantic Edwardian pattern! |
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| After dinner, you and your guests will retire to the sitting room to reminisce about the fan-damn-tastic meal you just bought for them in this restful retiring chamber! The floral pattern carpet sets the scene, while the wallpaper in a tastefully restrained "Baroque Brocade Circus Stripe" truly entertains the eye! Compliment the reds and oranges with a green dinette set and your relatives will all want to stay forever and ever! Holiday magic! YOU'RE WELCOME!!!!!! |
10/29/19
Fuelfed car show - 10/27/2019 - Part 2
Here are the rest of the photos from the Fuelfed car show from last Sunday, 10/27/19 in Winnetka, Illinois.
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| Early in the show, I was framing up a Jaguar, trying to fit the whole car in the frame, when a car rolled through my shot. I immediately shat myself, because it was unmistakably a Lancia Delta Integrale: the legendary rally champion, in Martini livery no less. Lancias are rare in the U.S. They were briefly sold here under the Fiat brand, but you basically never ever see them, no matter how many vintage events you go to. |
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| The Delta Integrale's dash. |
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| The only thing that could me more trouser-moisteningly great than seeing a Delta Integrale in the flesh would be a Lancia Stratos. The Delta was based on the Delta consumer model, but the Stratos was Lancia's purpose-built rally car that looks like a spaceship. It is the coolest looking thing ever created by humans. |
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| It was once the case that headlights were a single, replaceable unit. These were called "sealed beam" headlights, and they were generally round or square. The look of a round light recessed into an elliptical (or nearly so) housing is hard to improve upon. With the development of hallogen, LED or other just-replace-the-bulb modern headlights, the housing itself is intended to be permanent, and is worked into the shape of the grille or whatever. They can be any random, arbitrary shape, and the car manufacturers have taken advantage of this fact by making headlights any crazy, random shape they can think of. This is just one way in which the majority of current cars are overstyled and visually cluttered. By way of example, go look at a 2019 Honda Civic Si, and then look at this Dino. Grace and balance has been abandoned for hyperactive aggression for its own sake. This is awful. |
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| The Ferrari Dino that makes stout-hearted men swoon. |
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| It's hard to stop shooting a Dino. Every angle is basically a work of art. |
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| This photo makes clear the poor quality of the 1985 Tokina lens I was shooting with. The highlight the the lower left explodes into a soft bloom of pale orange light. If your objective is to capture reality as your eye sees it, this is terrible. But, your phone's camera can do that. Every inexpensive kit lens can do that, too. This filthy old Tokina, which, technically speaking, could use a good thirty-year cleaning, adds goldness and pinkness, and exaggerates bright light in a trippy, dreamy way. It's my current favorite. |
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| A De Tomaso Pantera is an Italian chassis with a Ford V8 in the back. |
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| The engine compartment of a Pantera is pretty weird. Huge V8, with the transmission behind it, but now drive shaft exiting the trans where it normally would. Instead, there are two half shafts going out the sides to drive the wheels. There is a surprising amount of room in the engine bay, because the bulk of the motor is just in front of the wheels. I imagine everything other than the most basic service is an engine-out procedure, which, by the looks of it, would be easier than in your average car. |
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| I hadn't seen those wheels before. On a 911, they look great, properly dished under the huge RSR-style fender flares. The owner and his wife were debating swapping them back to OEM. I did my best to reassure them there were enough bone-stock 911s rolling around already. |
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| The Volvo P1800 is up there with the Ferrari Dino at the top of the this-design-will-always-look-good Olympic podium. They're also mechanically simple and relatively easy to maintain. These can still be found for less than twenty thousand dollars... for now. |
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| I'm not an off-road guy, but I'm pretty sure this is a Land Rover Defender, in its naturaly state of "kinda dirty". |
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| A 1974 Jensen Interceptor. I'm pretty sure this car has a 7.2 liter V8. Even if it's "only" the 5.9 or 6.3 version, they always sound amazing. |
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| You're right, badge. It is. |
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| Add caption |
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| Mercedes 300SL. This one should be one of the later, non-gullwing '57-'63 roadster models. Don't care. Still pretty. Actually, the gullwing versions are said to be too warm inside. The gullwing doors are to blame for that. As with any gullwing door, it's difficult to engineer them with a proper roll-down window mechanism. This little niggle is easily enough addressed by just taking the top off entirely. More affordable, too. |
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| Porsche 356. Visually, this car pretty clearly bridges the gap between the VW Karmann-Ghia and the Porsche 911. |
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| You don't see grille badges much any more, except on vintage cars. That's a shame. |
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| This is the same Lamborghini Countach that I saw two weeks previously at the Then & Now show in Lake Forest. So, only one shot of it here. Unlike at the Lake Forest show, the doors were open, because there was no threat of rain. |
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| Love this color. I don't know the factory paint designation for the color, but it person it was more apple green than lime green. The yellow fog light covers really looked good against it. If I ever were to get a car painted, making a change from a factory color, it'd be something like this. |
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