Celotex - Keeps Steve Allen quiet

When we last left Steve Allen, he was promoting Wurlitzer electric pianos. He won some grudging respect despite the fact that he seemed a little prissy and a lot nerdy. Now he wants us to buy Celotex ceiling tiles in 1958, and he's selling them by showing us his super fantastic pad. Goddamn you, Steve.

There's Steve with one hand on the piano... and one elbow. Steve recorded so many albums that he probably sounded pretty great right as the picture was taken. Maybe he's inventing a new chord that can only be played by one hand, one elbow and Jayne Meadows' thigh?

So, Steve had a huge career, wrote a ton of books, got to sleep with Jayne every night AND had a house this cool, all while looking like the kid that ate paste in first grade. Hat tip to you, Mr Allen.

I'm getting pretty curious about this guy. I know he did a bunch of songs for Eyde Gorme and other famous sixties-type entertainers, but I couldn't hum one if you threatened me with violence. Maybe I need to fix that with the help of Amazon or iTunes? I have some homework tonight.

Anyway, there's Steve's house. Giant beams, stone floors, really cool room divider thing, very mod coffee table floor-to-ceiling windows, and ceiling tiles made of wadded paper (we hope). Do a Wikipedia search on Celotex and, rather than finding an article on the company itself, you find lots and lots of court cases, some of which are related to our old friend asbestos. Uh-oh spaghetti-o's!

I couldn't easily find any evidence that the Hush-Tone tiles in this ad were made with asbestos, and Steve lived to a pretty ripe old age of 78. So, assuming this ad was honest in that Celotex tiles were used in the Allen home, it doesn't look like asbestos took him out.

And even if he had died of mesothelioma, he'd just write a song about it and make a bunch of money. Steve was just that good, apparently.


Dan said...

I love that mesothelioma has its own domain. How many other diseases/disorders/afflictions have their own .com?

Oh, it's not a fan site? Damn...

Phil Are Go! said...

I know, man. Mesothelioma is all over the Disney channel. In fact, on "I Carly" last night... no wait. That's Justin Beiber.


Dave Pryor said...

HA! - Uh-oh spaghetti-o's! (a favorite Simpsons-ism)

More like "Uh-Oh Asbest-oh-no's"

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