Video Pro Glove - It must be gone for!

Video Games magazine, 1983. Gamers receive a glimmer of hope for their sore, blistered palms: the Video Pro Glove.
Designed by mother and video game outsider Carmel Delaney, it was meant to protect the tender palms of 1983's game addicts. Clearly, the obvious need for such a product is demonstrated by the widespread use of gaming gloves we can observe here in The Future. Wait a second. I've just been informed that nobody wears gloves to play video games. Oh well. People aren't always ready for The Next Great Idea.

This is not to say that people have stopped trying to sell us video gaming gloves. Far from it. However, Delaney was so far ahead of her time that those whose time she was also ahead of are still ahead of their time. That's a lot of time-aheadness. She was a visionary.
Video Pro's primary off-label application: beating up Daniel-San.
 A year after the Video Pro Glove was released to a baffled public, the gloves found a home on the hands of Johnny Lawrence, noted Prell user and super-mean leader of the Cobra Kai gang. Their motto was "No mercy... except perhaps for your blistered hands! But definitely no mercy for split ends!"

The metal edges underneath a standard banquet table are rarely de-burred.

After losing to Daniel Laruso in the All Valley Karate Tournament, Johnny became Greg Tolan and took up competitive food spilling (ESPN 3, most Wednesdays at 2:30 am.), eventually locking horns with Rick Morehouse in the cafeteria. Again, he looked to the Video Pro Glove for protection during Critical Bullying and Narrative Exposition Events (CBNEEs).

So really, just like the iPhone, duct tape, and electric scalp massagers, the Video Pro found a role in society beyond the original intended purpose. This is the sign of true genius. Carmel Delaney is one such genius. Maybe there's a little Carmel Delaney in all of us? Don't you think? No. Definitely not. ...Or is there?... No.


Sue said...

Not being a video game player, what would one need a "soft leather palm made of white Cabretta sheepskin" for? Does the joystick get irritated too?

[lrf] said...

No, but that's what he told his Mom...

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