Roblee Shoes - World's worst super b0wl party.

A certain segment of the American population would love to roll back the clock to the fifties, when gay people and racial minorities were just as much a part of our society, but easier to ignore. Aah, to have our country somehow transported back to the good old days, when everyone in mainstream America was a Pat Boone replicant. Good thing it's impossible. Apart from bigotry and hatred thinly disguised as piety, there's another reason this is a terrible idea. Fifties tech was terrible. Behold, the world's worst super b0wl party!

This ad is only concerned with shoes. Everything else is just decoration. So, it's mean to poke fun at this picture, knowing that it's not supposed to be a representation of reality, right?

Right! Let's begin. A 12" portable black and white TV set roughly similar to the one in this ad cost around $150 at the time. If the inflation calculator is to be believed, that's $1148 in current Future Money. You get a lot of TV for eleven hundred bucks now. ABT (A nice electronics specialty showroom in Chicago's Northern suburbs that's several steps above Best Buy) offers this Samsung 46" LED backlit LCD TV for almost exactly the same price, minus the annoying $200 mail-in rebate.

But apart from the sheer titchyness of the TV set itself, it's on a shelf eight inches above the floor. "Shew! Glad we put in that eight inch shelf! I was tired of bending all the way down to the floor to watch TV! My back is slightly less strained!" I think their TV shelf needs to be put on a higher shelf.

There are two "foot stools" in the picture too. Who makes six inch tall foot stools? At that height, you may as well just put your feet up on the dog. Snacks are a child-size bowl of pretzels. Hey big spender. "Thanks for inviting me over for your weak-ass superbowl party, Ron. I'm glad I turned down the invitation to the Elks lodge party for this. I hate you."

All of this, of course, is needed to keep the set decorations plausibly close to the floor, where the all-important shoes live. It must be hard being a photographer called in for a shoe ad. Nothing you try looks normal. You have to make it stupid to get the job done. But then that's advertising for you. Check your brain at the door, please.

Note: The word "super b0wl" is trademarked by the En Eff El, and thanks to their lawyers, no media can use the term, except for news reporting. The acronym for the organization is also verboten. I don't even care about football and this annoys me. Apparently our super advanced Future Lawyer Technology is running amok, ruining society. Why can't a dystopian future society ever be any fun to live in, like in the movies?

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