12/12/12

G-E Home Freezer - Freezing... at HOME!

Yep. As with all things that once were impossible, there was a time when freezing food was such a technological marvel that it was a family occasion. A regular food-freezing hootnanny. Good times, back in 1949.

But remember - in 1949 it was only1949. That was the year that somebody built NATO, some guys invented West Germany as well as the people's Republic of China. Also, Africa decided apartheid was a great idea. Hey! There's more! Britain recognized the independence of Ireland, putting an end to that whole rigmarole forever, right? Right? Right. Jeez. Maybe freezing some asparagus really was a kooky distraction?

"Even with all our 'spare-gus and brockly, and there's still
room for that hobo that daddy ran over!"
And with their wonderful new "home freezer", this family will have enough asparagus to keep their pee smelling weird all year long! Hm. "Home freezer." I wonder how long people used that term before just calling it a "freezer" became normal. When computers were new and exciting, people used to say "I'm getting a home computer" without meaning that the computer would be as big as their home. Now you just say "computer" if you're feeling relaxed and not particularly rushed. Mostly, you just say "PC", like you don't have time to sit around all day pronouncing things. Did anyone ever say "home television"? Probably not, because the TV pretty much debuted as a consumer device intended for the home. Did we ever say "home automobile" or "home bathtub"? I guess not.

But, the names of things definitely get shorter as they become more familiar, don't they? "Horseless carriage" becomes "automobile" which becomes "car". "Velocipede" becomes "bicycle" which is now "bike". "Pizza pie" became "pizza" which is now simply "food".

Here are some things that we can look forward to saying more quickly in the future...

-"Home cyclotron", as in "You can irradiate your wart in the 'tron, but until I'm done with the hair dryer. It always blows a breaker."

-"Home gas chromatograph", as in "I need to work tomorrow, I'd better decaffeinate my yogurt in the GC or I'll be up all night."

-"Positive displacement liposuction aspirator", as in "Are you done with the Dyson yet? Tad will be here in 20 minutes and I need to lose three pounds."


3 comments:

Anonymous said...

My Aunt Betty still refers to all cable television as the Home Box Office.

PhilAreGo@gmail.com said...

Hah! I can't remember the last time HBO went by that name. They've just been an acronym for decades. Thanks, mystery commenter!

[-Mgmt.]

Steve Miller said...

Perhaps they were never called "home iceboxes," but having a freezer in the home was novel. Used to was, you hauled food you want frozen down to the plant on Main Street, where astute technicians (wearing white lab coats, no doubt), perform this marvel of food preservation for you.

But wait! there's more! You wouldn't haul the goods home with you. You'd rent a storage locker for the rest of the year, and make frequent trips back to the plant as you planned out your meal schedule for the week.

Locally, the building that was the freezer plant now houses a cell phone dealer, as technology has marched on... you know another business that has disappeared? The fur storage place where momma parked her mink over the summer.

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