Modem Family

Joke #1 - "Okay, I've cycled power, and brought him back up after two minutes. He's still tumescent. Now what? Pardon? What? The pills didn't come with any 'special pliers'!"

Joke #2 - "Yep! It's cancer. Thanks doc! This was much more convenient that driving to the hospital."

Joke #3 - "Good news, honey! The doctor says the infection has 'ksssshhhht', whatever that means."

Joke #4 - "Ooooh, I see that your firmware is updated already. Verrrry up...dated."  -I.T. porn scene.

Joke #5 - "Okay, I've extracted the basilic vein from his forearm and stuck it up his nose. What? Shark fin powder on his nipples? No, I don't have.... sigh. Honestly, I was never asked to do anything like this before our clinic's help line was outsourced to Guangzhou."

Joke #6 - "Wups. I'm sorry, sir. With your coverage, your healthcare provider says no procedures will be covered for any claims involving your health, or care, of any kind. Please leave your wallet with the receptionist and, if you could, please throw yourself on the pile of bodies behind the building. Thank you so very much!"

Joke #7 - In 1963, much money was made by clinics offering reverse de-electrolysis treatments, or "rug jobs",  using The Sean Connerizer.

[Commenter jokes will be added to the post.   -Mgmt.]