Couple of Captions - Breaking it to them.

Joke #1 - "Whoops! The court will excuse me while I apologize to the gentleman behind me. I do believe I have a touch of The Vapors."

Joke #2 - "Can anyone in the court tell me where I can get a Typhoid injection? I have just gotten off a carriage from the New York."

Joke #3 - The defending attorney let out a heavy sigh. It was Miss Peacock for the prosecution. This case would be nothing but candlesticks and conservatories for weeks. That was her answer to everything.

Joke #1 - "Hello. Charlie. My name is Theodore. I'm.... I'm your real father. The father you knew was just a basset hound that wandered into the barn. I understand you're probably a bit upset by this, but I ask you to try and understand and not to bite me or pee on me. Of course, you'll feel the need to howl a bit. Anyone would."

Joke #2 - "I'm sorry, Charlie, but we still can't find the gang that stole the red or blue from your house. We did find some M, Y, and K hidden in a warehouse, but that was a few towns away, and they live in a totally different color gamut there."

Joke #3 - "Son, there's a woman here who claims to be your wife. Just how long has this been going on? Also, since when are you a fully grown man? You're grounded."

Joke #4 - "I'm sorry, Charlie. It doesn't look good. I'm afraid you've caught an especially virulent strain of 'marriage'. There's nothing I can do, so I guess I'll just bring her in."